I know I will be sounding selfish in this post, if not even like a spoiled brat BUT sometimes I hide my true feelings and today I really want to release them.
I am sitting here watching a football game, Go Gators!, and I begin to surf the Internet just to keep myself occupied and to keep for yelling so much. As I am scrolling through and looking at different people’s post I see two different families are building a house. These individuals are so happy with where their new house is. I begin to feel jealous. Here two different families are getting the house of their dreams and where is Robert and my dream house? I want to be happy for these families, but how can I be happy when I can’t see our dream unfolding.
When I look across the road at our land it still looks like a war zone! The roots are still there waiting to be bulldozed. Our house plans…well we haven’t heard from the draftsman about them in weeks, it is almost like we haven’t even began working on them to start with. This week we have faced many obstacles which tells me we are close to our break through, but how close is what I keep asking myself.
Robert and I did decide we want to possibly go a different route building our house then we originally planned. Even with this change I keep wondering how is it all going to come together. .. how can we possibly go from where we are to our final goal of a house?
I really do want to be happy for others and their happiness, I want to celebrate with others in their happiness. I also, want a place for Robert and I to call home. What I want isn’t much, but there are days like today where it seems like it is possible for so many others but when it comes to us, nothing! So I will be happy for these families and will keep praying, hoping and dreaming.
Okay my selfish rant is over!!!